Active Irresponsibility

I have an eight page paper that is due on Tuesday that I haven't started researching for yet. I know that I'm going to do something regarding Family Planning Programs, but I have no idea what specifically about them nor do I have any idea as to what my argument or thesis is going to be. I very much do not care. It is Sunday night and all I want to do is watch TV and movies. I may just still be reeling from the dream I had last night. I fell madly in love with a girl who vaguely resembled my best friend's ex-girlfriend, but only vaguely. Things didn't end up going well for me in this dream because it led to me waking up and feeling oh so very alone. The part I remember most vividly of the dream was when I first kissed the dream girl in question. It was the most vivid aspect of a dream I've had in months. It was a whole body experience exactly similar to kissing someone passionately. I woke up covered in sweat and my sheets were still wet from it. I haven't had such a strong emotional reaction to a dream in a very long time, longer than I can remember. I haven't had sex with anyone in eight months. I haven't had an emotional connection with anyone in much longer. I haven't experienced basic human connection with anyone for longer than I care to analyze. Woah, this post really got away from me. Homework! Not doing it. I'm gonna throw some shoes on and head to the store to buy some candy. I shall sit here and be irresponsible until it is Monday morning when I vow (I'll likely break this immediately) to be a responsible member of academia and actually do things and do them on time. I just want to kiss somebody. I'm a good dude. Girls don't like me apparently, which is another issue entirely, but come on? I'm not outrageously unattractive or anything. Maybe I am: Who knows. I certainly don't. Hours of television, I'm coming to get you. OH, real quick: I spoke to my brother and spilled some of my mental nonsense onto him which was nice because I haven't done that in a really long time, if ever. Alright. I'll see you all the next time my self-loathing resurfaces. Goodbye.